I have been showing up for a long time now looking for rich conversation…. I love you all deeply and I am always looking out for your good, but mostly I am looking for any small sign of life within you. Not just ordinary life but the place within in you that is gurgling ready to surge into a vortex of passion and joy. This place is where Real life is, not in your petty annoyances and simple dramas.
Before I reveal the secret to my rich fantasy life, I must broach the subject of the many religious, spiritual, philosophical, intellectual along with physical pursuits and organizations. All of these are tools for awakening and keys to higher and more passionate living. The hammer I wish to use to crush in you, is the stiff way you move through these activities, if these truly are going to result in the manifestation of greater living I hope that you desire you must begin to notice the entombed way you function in them. All ideas and activities that enhance life’s creativity and joy are expansive in their qualities. If you are not immensely excited and filled with wild anticipation in not only your planned activities but also in things like getting your oil changed, then you are dead on some level. I can say this with deep love to you because I have witnessed this more times than not in my conversations and lack of since conscious remembering, and this is the antithesis of life. What I am saying to you is it is time now to wake up get turned on and get excited, be immersed in a stated of orgasmic living. Be having the greatest sex of your lives. I certainly don’t to mean be on a synthetic high or pretend fake inauthentic enthusiasm. Becoming alive and real can never be faked this is where the wheat gets separated from the chaff.
First you must stop making excuses for your real expressions to come forth, your stories about never having enough time for yourself and I am so busy working at my regimented job and all the you don’t understand I can’t because or he or she won’t let me is a weak sham. You and I both know the truth is it takes a desire so strong that if you die or lose all friendships and walk the world alone this is the only thing that is truly important. We all must be willing to be the fool and to walk alone unsupported by the tribe, to be free to flourish. Stop using people like me to point your finger at and observe like an oddity, that to will become boring after a while. Be willing to roll in the dirt in your best outfit, be willing to wear your best to the worst possible event. Stop being two faced, be who you are in all places and relationships. Stop buying the model of even your most advanced teachers and organizations. Tell the truth and realize that even that is constantly changing moment by moment.
Now that we got all the crap out of the way, here is the secret to my rich fantasy life. Numero uno, desire is good and the more we desire the better. Spend time dreaming up all the desires you can dream of and then expound on them. Really get into it and the feeling it creates for you when you image it is real. The key is how it makes you feel this is what causes expansion and joy to increase within you. Imagine the wildest scenarios and repeat them as you enter sleep, meditate and are standing in line at the market. Do not go any further than this for now, because developing a rich body of desire impels you forward on your growth path. Whatever desire for the good of all, no hurt or harm to anyone must grow from within like a seed being first germinated and then grown into a sapling and then it will become a strong young tree and at this point outward manifestation and interdimensional travel toward other realms and vistas can begin.
Purify your thoughts, and stop judging what comes out of that. Ask the divine for help in all things all of the time, Ask and ye shall receive and stop judging what you receive, accept the gifts and be immensely grateful. Think on what is good and lovely and stop judging what you think is good and lovely. Stop looking at the world and judging what you do not like or prefer, this is the biggest block to your growth into joy and freedom. The thing you judge the most is your greatest gift. You do not always know your greatest friend when there standing right in front of you waving there arms with Jesus standing next to them screaming hey you, yah you I am talking to you, I am here to announce I am your greatest friend. So please stop beating yourselves up over your percieved mistakes and personal folly. IT is o.k. to get the joke you heard at the party ten years later, it’s never to late and it’s still as funny now as it was then. And in truth all time is now anyway.
We are Multi dimensional beings existing in a Holographic Universe, so what is all the hoopla above about what is real or facing reality. It is how we believe it to be, if life is hell or we are all going to it in a hand basket then guess what? That’s real. What if life is an exciting adventure where if were good we’ll get to have our own dragon, is that worth working on waking up for. If not dream something else up that is equally exciting to you. Enjoy the adventure. STOP taking your dreams and pursuits so fucking seriously, if your not willing to be the worst at what you do how in gods name can you even get out of bed in the morning, try it, take on being the worst writer the worst teacher artist etc…. I don’t mean literally try to be bad, I do mean take chances, explore new models and ways of being that are not the norm. Especially realize that you cannot teach anyone anything that they do not already know, you are not the god or goddess of your given profession so stop unconsciously trying to be that, just practice being a space where life lives through you in beautiful and expansive ways.
Stop taking trips of different version of the same slightly more interesting that deadening boredom and wake up to the adventure of the magical universe where sacred rocks and some not so sacred speak to you. The magical universe is teeming with life waiting for you to raise up your vibration enough so to speak, so you can hear and see where all the mysteries of all that is or was are revealed, and all this can happen on your morning jog. Blessing of the light Dawn
I Yearn To….
I yearn to enter into the world naked except for thick black masking tape to cover my breasts and pubic area. I shall dance freely in my Madonna esque wear, not the media type beauty but the wildish nature freedom beauty. My body and each curve and texture free and pulsating. I yearn for the pivot points of the mind control police to converge all around as I continue my perfectly choreographed freedom movements. If they are as large a group as a city I shall not be afraid. They will yell accusations at me, “you are crazy, you cannot enter life like that, what are you doing, stop it stop it or we will control you. I will not stop and the leaders will converge upon me and become one. Like a large steel fortress they will surround my torso in their steely grip, down I will fall like Christ being nailed to the cross I will become no longer a wild natured woman but a marytor for mankind. They will tell me I have failed as a mind That everything I have done or stood for meant nothing and that I am nothing. I am unafraid for I know their game and how it is played.
I yearn for them to come for me, to grip me tightly as my wildish pulsing freedom cannot help but touch their cold machine like ways. They will call all the helpers in suppression to become 5 beings of dripping darkness to grasp my head my two arms and long supple legs. They will begin to rip my body apart only to reveal a point in the center of my body of light. As they pull in all direction The center of my being will reveal the light of the sun so bright and so hot that they cannot run to escape fast enough as the light burst forth. This light envelopes all that is not real the mind controllers are turned to ash and fall to fertilize the mother goddess. I expand my light and as this takes place all the innocents sleep in my warmth. My body of light enters all dark places to dissolve that which is harmful and heals all wounds and fear. As all beings, all life on mother earth sleeps we are healed and transformed as if in an instant.
After a while which is one night I will reform as my true nature in human form, a beautiful yet only slightly flawed,(for continued growth) woman. I shall then clothe my self in iredesent gossamer fashion fitting for movement and flowing like my long silky golden hair. In the morning of this night all will awaken forever transformed according to each beings highest vision and I will move among all unrecognized for my part and happy for it.
When you see me you will be amazed sometimes not knowing why you will look intently at me for longer than usual not knowing why. You will be transformed in my sight, to even see the last piece of fabric on the end of my dress and I turn the corner sends you into a spinning vortex of ecstatic light. This is the secret to my rich fantasy life, this is why I care little if you see my beauty or recognize the love I deeply feel for you. This is why I am increasingly unafraid of my own apparent failings, for I know this is not only true for me but it is also true for you. I you choose to accept this mission. This message will explode in thirty seconds……